The tagline for this blog is “Life is complicated. The truth isn’t.” I didn’t put much thought into the phrase- it came to me and I went with it. For years, I’ve been known as the kind of person who is honest. This recognition is important to me as honesty is not just a throwaway word- it’s a description of character. I want to be known as a person who lived in their truth. Do I fail from time to time? Absolutely. I think a person would be pretty formidable if they never bent the truth or omitted a few things. I’d also wonder about the quality of their familial and romantic relationships. The cliched “do these jeans make me look fat?” question may be met with an all-too-honest answer. Imagine the hurt feelings!
Jokes aside, when it comes to life and love, I have a hard time not telling the truth. This may be because I don’t speak unless I have something to say. Only in close and personal relationships do I ramble or chat just for the heck of it. Yet even in those interactions, I find it imperative to tell the truth. Not when wanted. Not when I deem it appropriate. I simply tell it. Of course, I’m tactful and choose my words carefully. The truth may hurt but your poor delivery will make it sting. The distiniction is in the intention.
I tell the truth for me and for the person who’s hearing it. It’s obvious why the person should hear the truth but some of you may wonder why it’s beneficial for you to tell the truth. Without getting too fluffy, I’ll keep it pretty simple: When you tell the truth, you are living in truth. When you lie, you are constructing a lie around yourself. Lies are toxic and incredibly fragile. You’ll notice that once one lie is told, you have to keep telling more to support the house that you’ve built out desperation and dishonesty. Depending on who you’re trying to decieve and how smart they are, they may notice the holes in your house of lies. They may point them out. And what will you do? You’ll probably lash out in anger to defend yourself- against a lie YOU told! Isn’t it remarkable how toxic just one tiny little lie can be?
That’s why I make it a point to live in truth to the best of my ability. It’s evident in the quality of my relationships, my work, and my sense of self. Self-love is not possible without knowing yourself first. And the first step to understanding yourself is by telling the truth to yourself- about your likes, dislikes, motivations, etc.
Tell the truth. It matters.
“One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We cannot be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”
―Maya Angelou
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